dream recall

 

7-20-24 

wearing a full length dress almost like a ball gown, but it had a white belt with a tied bow

i didn't want that

so i took it off and was searching for a green silk tie

" the forest knows where you are and you must let it find you" - 'Lost' a Native Elder's poem

09-03-24

in India, in a hospital.

it was war time, chaotic, people not being seen or treated

my mother was there somewhere

i looked out the window, and there were trees

and a towering edifice, a sculpture of intertwined warring gods

i looked for Ganesha, the elephant god, remover of obstacles

later i'm trying to hang up clean laundry in a closet

i finally managed to put my mother's robe on a hanger

"we're letting people take over who have no idea who they really are" 

"when things get really rough, there's an acceleration of calling" - Michael Meade

in the key of let it be

 

[Verse 1]

atmospheric river rain’s been passing through
it’s early spring, a rabbit year,  sky’s the limit blue
every kind of green
clouds floating at my feet
and i’m still stirring the same old stew
ruminating, it’s what i do

[Verse 2]

feathers flashing, crow lands nearby
special deliv-ry, pay attention, came all the way down from the sky
thought it was time that we should meet
crow and human, beyond the concrete
communicating eye to eye
all the way down from the sky

[Chorus]

i’m walking where  - crows, live oak, and prickly pear - 
live in the world, beyond the concrete        

[Verse 3]

sharp old cacti don't mind me
sliding off the trail, outside the lines
where’s that lucky break,
right about now when you need one?
heading straight for those spines
out of the clouds and into the spines

[Verse 4]
wheel's in motion, how's it gonna end ride
no things to hold onto, nothing to hide
crow says "let it go"
watching from the rattlesnake sign
"what's in your head, most of the time
is not on your side"

[Chorus]

i’m falling where  - crows, live oak, and prickly pear - 
live in the world, beyond the concrete        

[Verse 5]
cactus standing, still not minding me
rolling down the hill to the live oak tree
from the chaparral, into the woods
still breathing ….. that’s good
maybe time to breathe more like a tree             
in the key of let it be

[Chorus] (2 x)

i'm staying where - crows, live oak, and prickly pear - 
live in the world, beyond the concrete     

© leslie a. h. cochran
   

practice

 

tune to the key of 

open everything

to hear

white crowned sparrow

sing at dusk

from the tall stand of dead bamboo 

notes that reach

the muddy mind

being still, for a change 

allowing the sweet shower

until there is nothing to think

nothing to do

turning

in time to see

sailing bedsheets pinned to a line, not quite dry

wave to the darkening sky

break free

not practical maybe

but in this case,

somehow fitting

weather

 

Galapagos penguins, 1980

do i even know how to journal anymore? "it's good for you" they say. "try thirty minutes a day."

i write: "the lighting is not right." "it throws shadows of my hand onto the page where the words come out."

i used to draw.
"oh, and drawing is good for you too." "don't worry what it looks like, that is not the point."

ok well, here's my hand holding a leaf, that turned into a bird with hands for wings. the bird is flying and crying under a cloud that offers five raindrops.

today is very hot, again. formations to the east make no such promises.

hands in the bird,  June 2022

update, 3:40 pm
maybe there is something to this writing and drawing. The little icon under the weather service's ominous "Excessive Heat Warning" just now changed from a flat yellow sun to a little gray cloud with two blue slashes underneath and the words: "scattered thunderstorms." 

old long since

or how to remember dreams, a new year's eve recipe

A cup of kindness might sound like a song, one ready at the drop of a hat. A beautifully tuned old piano, the nimble pianist pouring familiar chords through the phone line, over the miles away. Tear drops ensue. Washing the precious old, glinting as they tumble, hinting of the new. 

A dash of Bogie, why not? Nod off half way through The Big Sleep. Wait one hour while the film noir steeps in the handed down mixing bowl.

From Raymond Chandler to Carl Jung, someone is now reading aloud "The Sleeping Beauty", not your Disney version. Shadow work calls for the old wooden spoon. Stir in thirteen spices, gifts from the thirteen fairies.  A baker's dozen, for good measure.  The soul ingredients. Fullness of who you have always been and are becoming.

Set the cookstove to however many degrees and call it a night.

At 3:00am deep bass sounds reach my ears, eyelids flutter. revelers still reveling.  Pulling back the veil of sleep to reveal the dream, I fumble for and mumble into a voice recorder: "cat in the garage, console, something about closets and clothes, spider in the toilet, anyway, dream new year's eve."

going through old closets in the old house to retrieve dresses (not my usual attire), the feeling i have missed some and going back. finding one that must be my moms, sparkly silvery gray. in the house with the memories everywhere, i get up to pee. surprised by a strange spider,  i instinctively flush, and then regret the unintended casualty. there's an enormous console in the garage. an edifice of mistakes made, quarantined for safety. i worry about this and why he can't hear me. my black cat nemo is young again and tries to escape the house. but there is an alarm and i am diligent.  retrieving, saving, securing. i lean on my mother's kitchen table, hewn from solid oak, hearing the familiar creaks and groans. i can feel the soft patina of consolation, the round hub from days of yore. the fairy god Mother in her shimmering silver gown asks the question: "are you ready to let go?" waking, holding the golden nugget prompt: "you haven't seen the best part yet. it lights up."

The voice recorder was last used two (feels like a million) years ago. My humble rendition of: "Visions of Johanna"

"Ain't it just like the night to play tricks when you're tryin' to be so quiet?
We sit here stranded, though we're all doin' our best to deny it."

Thanks psyche. We know I am slow, but I get the message, sort of.
You deserve your own kindness, the mother of all love
Don't forget letting go and lightening up, 
frightening as it may be.

Maybe one day just to make sure,
bake me an elderberry pi at 3.14....................on the dial.
might take a while
but eventually
I'll pull up a chair and we can share
into infinity.

500 word challenge
01/03/22
© leslie anne hinich 

late october

 

—watch for snakes!
the ranger shouted
twice, in bold subtext
the reminder

wouldn't want to tango with a sidewinder

he must have read the rumor
she tends to melancholic humor
to lichen covered rock and spider webs, outside the beaten path

saddled the jeep to head off the aftermath
before it happens
bending time and space...............................

still a question lingers on her face

the ranger's getting smaller
dust clears, at last she hears, in the echo of his holler
—watch for snakes!

wakhavumi

 

turning on the trail this morning, following imprints of days past. it’s late october.
prickly pear and coast live oak provide sharp relief. two familiars in a now conserved area, 
named by the Luiseno people: “wakhavumi”, the frog pond.

yellow flowers are blooming. enthusiasts have returned, more or less on any given day.
knowing the path is no less a mystery.  you might see coyote.
“watch for snakes!” the ranger shouts as he motors past.

mind wants to see problems this way and that
the birds want to sing and the song somehow gets through.
stop, breathe. we’re here too.

10/31/21
500 words back to writing challenge becomes 100 for now

going into

verse 4 is a mystery..

"Crazy Chester followed me, and he caught me in the fog
Said, "I will fix your rack, if you'll take Jack, my dog"
I said, "Wait a minute Chester, you know, I'm a peaceful man"
He said, "That's okay, boy, won't you feed him when you can"
-"The Weight", Robbie Robertson

with a conditional pivot point
why the trepidation,
is Jack a war-like dog?
will "me" ever get a good night's sleep ?
somehow i think not but
it matters not
for verse four is
a great bit of songwriting in spite of or because of it all

why i listen to Dylan
and hey also Buddy Holly

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

wobbling, at a typically uneven pace
probably really not that complicated
nothing is

like matter isn't even anywhere
, quantum-wise
we're mostly space

mystery will abide
can't be manufactured
it's been tried
more than once or twice

Buddy sings it so easy
up tempo.. down tempo
it's raining and the weatherman says clear today
maybe baby, but there we go
just enough of  a question to disappear

through a portal on a time ticking line of fate
an off note that's so right on, a twist
busting up predictable increments
diving headlong into incredible predicament

ho hum it's just a tune right? can't be that hard..
some sort of bridge,  maybe a middle eight..

 

cactus inspired songwriting, part 1

cactus, found by the side of the round

[chorus] or [verse] not sure

maybe you won't, maybe you might
find occasion to write

a rough draft
one finely wrought
with spiny symmetry

'bout the dreams
under your skin

sensitive and thin
anymore i'm
too old to hold them in

or it's breezy where you are
and papers won't stay put
nice imagery, like kites without strings

who knows these things?
the next day the wind is calm again
and magic is a foot
remembering

moon rise 
over the rose garden

step 1

the basket, empty all this time

raven for remembrance
rust and cut glass

pine cone sequoia, still green branch
from last october
before the snow

charming, rough stuff
sewn and frayed edges
some other life

moon crater marble
found ages ago

cd and cover design

cd and cd cover design
photo collage,
leslie anne cochran
2010

http://www.dreamythology.com/graphic-design.html

collages from 2001

cut paper collage:

"Water Mandala"
"Celtic Mandala"

NFS

http://www.dreamythology.com/

an occurrence without recorded documentation

leaving the devices alone last night i ventured to the front porch to just sit and watch the moon rise.
an opportunity, now that a calmer tenant occupies the house below.

this is not say it was quiet, the neighbor's birds making night time noises and the musicians down the hill were having a party. Willie Nelson's "Always on my Mind" wafted up on the air waves.
 
"may i be at peace"
"may my heart remain open"
"may i awaken to the light of my own true nature"
"may i be healed"
"may i be a source of healing for all beings "

sound of someone lapping water from the bowl i fill for other animals
turning to look into the eyes of a possum, looking back into my eyes

mutual recognition
"oh there is a being and we see each other"

she/he then disappeared into the rose bushes
and this human animal who always, always has something to show or say out loud
tries to write in the morning about looking and listening.

some point along a path, pre-1955

maybe it's that simple
almanac phases
plans to sow and reap
exhausted, fall asleep
awaken to a fiery pimple
talk about the weather, sing praises
watch the rise and recede
sometimes
push and pull the hungry need
from our dreams

routine keeps the rare in weave and seams
one day looking up,  a shiver
something is biting the light
in slow increments, replaced by a terrible darkness
echos deep in the gut, inform the liver

a finely wrought halo halts the breath
still somehow making sound
flicking through the old reels
for context
where and how far gone, remember
how it feels
surrendered at the lost and found
forever?

once again, danger
there are directions to follow
revealing a bright bauble, don't stare
wiping tears
shielding eyes from retina burns
painful souvenirs 

deaf to prayer
the sun returns
cool moon hovers nearby
unperturbed by all the drama
can't know we named them dad and mama
can't feel the fear we'd die

leslie anne cochran 08/13/17

1983 she's

little white pup chinook at waterfall cuyamaca - leslie

peace eye

1:00 pm
it's raining . raindrop on an orange flower close up is beautiful .  i let myself be happy .

of course it's today

happy birthday , be well
remember joy , peace